dads daughter body image

Dads: 6 tips to Help your Daughter Develop a Positive Body Image

Dads play an important role in helping daughters develop a positive body image

If you are a Dad of an adolescent girl, unfortunately, you may have heard your daughter say something like, “I am so ugly” or “I hate my thighs, they are so fat”. You may have stared at her like a deer in headlights. Or perhaps offered her well-intended advice such as “just cut down on carbs if you are worried about becoming fat” or offered re-assurance to her such as “You are not fat, you are beautiful just how you are”.  Unfortunately, societal pressure to look a certain way for boys and men is becoming more common.  For girls and women, it is a

Unfortunately, societal pressure to look a certain way for boys and men is becoming more common.  For girls and women, it is a societal norm to experience & talk about body dissatisfaction. Girls and women are inundated with media images about how they “should” look.Continue reading

summer eating disorder recovery college student

How to Stay on Track with Eating Disorder Recovery during the Summer: Tips for College Students

Keeping on top of your eating disorder recovery can be tough during the summer months if you are a college student.

Summers in Texas are hot.  I mean sweaty hot.  Despite the heat, I love summer because it usually means more free time to spend with family & friends, fewer demands and most importantly – vacation.  Everything just feels a little more relaxed during the summer.  Summers in my college days were the best, whether I was taking a few summer courses, traveling abroad or hanging out home.

Keeping recovery a top priority during summer can be tough if you are a college student.  Whether you are heading home or staying close to campus, eating disorders can become exacerbated in the summer.

Pitfalls of eating disorder recovery in the summer:

  1. Change in routine.  During the summer schedules change.  Most students are relieved because schedules become much less demanding during the summer.  However, change in routine can be tough.   Routines make us feel comfortable because we know what to expect.  Routines can help you stay on track with your meal plan, treatment appointments, sleeping habits, etc.  Disruption in routine can mean a disruption of established patterns of recovery.
  2. Less structured time.  One common struggle in eating disorder recovery is being able to tolerate unstructured time.  It isn’t uncommon for eating disorder sufferers to have an increase in eating disorder thoughts and behaviors when feeling bored, lonely, etc. During the summer there tends to be a lot more unstructured time.
  3. Reduction or increase in independence.  Depending on your living situation, you may experience a decrease in independence if you are returning home for summer to live with your family.  Returning to the family home may cause some stress because you are used to living away at college and making your own decisions.  Or, if you are traveling or working away from family and friends, you may have a significant decrease in social support.
  4. Exacerbation of body image disturbance.   Because of summer temperatures, we spend more time in bathing suits, short sleeves, and shorts which can often increase body checking and preoccupation of body weight and shape/size which can lead to an increase in eating disorder behaviors.

Although there are some potential obstacles during summer, there are several ways to keep the momentum of recovery going over the summer months.

4 tips to stay on track with eating disorder recovery during summer:

  1.  Keep eating disorder recovery a priority. It is summer break from school, but not from recovery.   Keep recovery front and center if you don’t want to backslide on the progress you have made!  There are several ways to keep recovery a priority such as having regular check-ins with your treatment team, journaling about your progress and areas to improve on, reading books & articles about recovery, attending support groups, etc.
  2. Make a plan.  Whatever your summer plans are, strategize ahead of time. How are you going to keep on top of your meal plan, self-care and treatment appointments?  Talk to your treatment team in advance about your summer schedule. Collaborate with them on your care over during the summer months.
  3. Ask for help. Talk with your family, loved ones or support person about how you plan to stay on track with your eating disorder recovery.  Discuss potential areas of concern,  learn how to ask for help and communicate areas of success to loved ones.  Interact regularly with your treatment team, particularly if you feel like you are struggling.
  4. Learn to say no.  Taking on too much, particularly early on in eating disorder recovery, is an easy way to get derailed.  This may mean saying “no” to fun social engagements, a job, an internship or a vacation in order to spend time on your recovery.

While there are ways to hinder eating disorder recovery over the summer, with planning and persistence you can keep recovery front and center!

Are you interested in learning more tips about eating disorder recovery?  If so, sign-up for free tips here!

 

summer eating disorder recovery college student
summer eating disorder recovery college student
treatment team

Building a Treatment Team to Help You Conquer Your Eating Disorder

I am sure you have heard the African proverb “It takes a village to raise a child”.   The same can be said for treating an eating disorder.  It takes a village.  When it comes to treating & recovering from an eating disorder the village looks like medical professionals, friends, and family.

Having the support system in place when seeking treatment can make all the difference. All too often I have clients who have been struggling for years with an eating disorder who haven’t ever had a true treatment team in place. Without one, the likelihood of a full recovery is often greatly reduced.

Who should you look toward to build your treatment team?

If you’re struggling with anorexia nervosa, bulimia nervosa or binge eating disorder, it’s crucial to build up your support system. The types of people you should look toward when creating your treatment team are:

A Medical Doctor

Establishing good medical care is a must in the treatment of an eating disorder.  Unlike, many psychological disorders, eating disorders can have serious medical consequences–in some cases resulting in death.   Eating disorders can cause severe medical problems such as heart conditions, hypoglycemia, kidney failure, poor bone health and even death. Medical care for an eating disorder can include a physical assessment, laboratory tests such as blood work, EKG, etc.

While you may have an established care provider whom you see for routine care, it is important that you find a doctor that has experience treating eating disorders. Doctors not trained in treating eating disorders may overlook symptoms or not know what to assess for and may miss or minimizes symptoms that the sufferer is experiencing. A good place to start is the Medical Guide for Eating Disorders.

Psychotherapist

At first glance, an eating disorder may appear to be about food.  But if you suffer from an eating disorder or have a loved one with an eating disorder you may have already begun to realize that eating disorders are not really about food. Rather, eating disorders emerge as a way to cope with life.  People develop eating disorders for many different reasons and the role of the psychotherapist is help the sufferer find healthier ways to cope with life instead of using eating disorder behaviors.

Most folks with eating disorders also have a co-occuring mental health condition such as anxiety and/or depression.  The psychotherapist also helps the sufferer with co-occurring conditions.

Psychotherapist, therapist for short, is a general term for clinicians trained in psychotherapy.  A therapist could by a psychologist (has a Ph.D. in psychology), a licensed clinical social worker, a marriage family therapist or a licensed professional counselor (the later hold at minimum a master’s degree).  Lastly, a psychiatrist is a physician who can provide therapy and prescribed medications for mental health conditions.

Not all therapists have a lot of training in the treatment of eating disorders, just like when selecting a physician, be sure to select one that has experience with treating an eating disorder.

Psychiatrist

A psychiatrist is a medical doctor who is specifically trained in the diagnosis and treatment of mental health conditions. They are trained in psychotherapy, like a therapist, but also can assess the need for medication in treating mental health conditions. A psychiatrist, due to their training as doctors, can also rule out any underlying medical or medications that may be contributing to mental health problems.  Some psychiatrists focus on prescribing and managing medications while others will manage medication and do psychotherapy.

On your team, you may have a psychiatrist that provides both psychotherapy and medication management or see a psychiatrist for medication management and a therapist for psychotherapy.

A Registered Dietitian

If you have an eating disorder, you probably already know a lot about food.  You probably know how many calories, how much fat and how many grams of sugar are in different foods.  You’re probably an expert on the latest diets. So you may be asking yourself, “Why do I need to see a dietitian for my recovery if I already know so much about food?”.

But remember, eating disorders are not really about food.  Food and eating disorder behaviors are used to cope with stress, relationship struggles, worry, and other uncomfortable feelings.

With this in mind, we know that knowledge about food is not the issue, but rather how you relate to food.  A registered dietitian can support you in your recovery. They will help to ensure that you’re eating enough food consistently throughout the day and help untangle food facts from food myths.

One final note:

It’s important to make sure that all or the majority of the members of the treatment team have experience treating eating disorders.  Here are some questions to ask when interviewing clinicians for your treatment team:

  1.  What are your credentials?  For example, do you hold a license to practice therapy or nutritional services?
  2. Do you belong to any professional eating disorder groups where you receive on-going education to stay-up-to-date on the treatment of eating disorders?
  3. How long have you been treating clients with eating disorders?
  4. What is your philosophy for treating eating disorders?
  5. Do you have other clinicians that you can refer me to in order to help me with my recovery?
  6. How often will you communicate with other clinicians on my treatment team?
  7. How often can I expect to see you?
  8. When do you typically see clients (day, evening, weekends, for example)?
  9. How will you assess my progress?
  10. What is the typical length of treatment for my type of eating disorder?
  11. Will you bill my health insurance carrier or will I need to do that?
treatment team
treatment team
rejecting diet mentality

Rejecting the Diet Mentality is Key to Healing Your Relationship with Food

We are inundated with messages about what to eat and what not to eat. This is not a new phenomenon—it has been happening since at least the 1970s (if not earlier). With the internet and social media at our fingertips, we are receiving diet advice from so-called experts constantly.

In spite of all this, Americans’ relationship with food seems more screwed up than ever. This plethora of diet messages leaves us even more confused about how to feed ourselves. Diet messages leave us feeling guilty or ashamed of food choices as if we broke some moral code.

If you struggle with food or have a full-blown eating disorder, my guess is that you have been on at least one diet, if not several. Dieting – or the diet mentality – is the real culprit behind eating problems.

The downside of dieting

There is good evidence that dieting doesn’t work for weight loss, and some studies show that dieting leads to weight gain, problematic eating behaviors (such as binge eating), and problematic exercise behaviors. Dieting is a risk factor for developing an eating disorder. Dieting erodes self-esteem and physical and mental health.

Only about 5% of dieters can keep lost weight off. Remember: it’s the diets that fail, not the people on them. Diets are an ineffective (and in some cases dangerous) prescription for weight loss and health.

Dieting gets in the way of our innate ability to feed ourselves. Diets ask us to drink liquid shakes, eat at certain times (no matter if we are hungry or not), eat foods that we may or may not like, oversimplify foods as either “good” or “bad,” and count calories or grams. They don’t take into consideration our culture or bank account.

Diets disconnect us from ourselves.

What is the diet mentality?

The diet mentality is the way of thinking about food and how to feed yourself based on past diets you have been on or read about.

Another way to think about it is simply “diet talk” or other food rules.

The diet mentality can be that inner voice that says, “I shouldn’t eat that. It will make me gain weight,” or “I am only eating clean.” Or it can be that well-meaning fitness instructor who says, “We are burning off all those extra calories we ate over the weekend,” or Aunt Susan stating at Sunday dinner, “I have been so good today. I can have a slice of pie.”

Rejecting the diet mentality allows us to connect with the intuitive eating ability we are all born with, in order to reconnect and heal our relationship with food.

Tips for rejecting the diet mentality

Name it.

When you see, hear, or think about messages about food, notice if it is diet talk. Here are some examples of the diet mentality:

  • “I shouldn’t eat after 8 pm.”
  • “Don’t eat anything with added sugar.”
  • “Running for 30 minutes burns off so many calories.”

In these examples, do you see how these messages are blanket statements that may or may not apply to you? The kicker is that once one of these diet rules is “broken,” you are left feeling guilty and bad about yourself. Never mind that you were hungry and hadn’t eaten since lunchtime.

Evaluate whether the message is helpful or harmful.

Diet rules were intended to help us in our relationship with food, but as stated above, they do not actually do this.

  • Does your diet get you where you want to be?
  • Does it leave you feeling good or like crap about yourself?
  • Does the thought help you feed yourself the way you want to on a routine basis?
  • Would you feel confident giving this advice to a dear friend?

Thoughts that may be more helpful include, “If I eat red sauce, I most likely end up with heartburn” or “When I overeat, I feel physically uncomfortable.” These thoughts provide detailed information about how to feed yourself. They connect you with your body and eating experience.

Practice, practice and more practice.

It takes a lot of practice to recognize the diet mentality for what it is. It will get easier with time, and there is no problem with seeking help if you need it.

 

For more information on how to reject the diet mentality, check out Intuitive Eating or schedule your consult today.

rejecting diet mentality
rejecting diet mentality infographic
Reduce Binge Eating

5 Ways a Dietitian Can Help Reduce Binge Eating

Whether you are struggling with binge eating disorder or bulimia nervosa, a dietitian who specializes in eating disorders on your treatment team is a must.

If you have an eating disorder, you probably already know a lot about food.  You probably know how many calories, how much fat and how many sugar grams are in different foods.  You probably are an expert on the latest diets.   You may be asking yourself, “Why do I need to see a dietitian for my recovery if I already know so much about food?”.

Remember, eating disorders are not really about food.  Food and eating disorder behaviors are used to cope with stress, relationship struggles, worry, and other uncomfortable feelings.

Therefore, knowledge about food is not the issue, but rather how you relate to food.

5 ways that a dietitian can help in binge eating disorder and bulimia nervosa recovery:

1. Reduce chaotic eating associated with binge eating.

Binge eating can cause chaotic eating patterns in several ways.  After a binge, you may find yourself not wanting to eat for several hours or skip the next meal.  This turns into a nasty cycle because skipping meals can then lead to more binge eating.   If you tend to binge (or binge-purge) at a certain time of the day, let’s say in the evening, then you may tend to restrict food during the day in order to “make-up” for binge eating later on in the evening.  Again, restricting calories can exacerbate the binge eating.  A registered dietitian will help set-up a meal plan to reduce the food chaos.

2. Ensure that you are eating enough at meals and snacks.

Studies show that food restriction leads to binge eating.   Our bodies want to ensure that we get enough food.  If we chronically underfeed it at certain times of the day then when we have access to food, we will eat more than we made need at that moment.  Along with helping manage your chaotic eating style, a dietitian can help ensure that you are eating enough throughout the day with enough variety to help reduce binge eating.

3.  Challenge mistaken beliefs about food.

A dietitian can help you sort out science from fad when it comes to eating, food, weight, and shape.  There are a million messages about food on TV and social media and from well-meaning friends, family members, and co-workers.  On any given day, it seems like the messages about which foods are “good” and which foods are “bad” to eat are moving targets.  During the 90s, fat was the culprit.   Now gluten and carbohydrates have a bullet on their head.  Not only do we get messages about which foods to eat, but also how to eat them—eat these foods;  not these foods; eat 6 small meals a day;  don’t eat in between meals.  You get the point.  There are so many messages out there, it’s no wonder America is plagued with eating problems.

Challenging mistaken beliefs about food can reduce feelings of guilt and increase your confidence about food choices, which ultimately help reduce binge eating and the binge-purge cycle.

4. Learn how to eat “binge foods” without fear.

A dietitian can help you feel more confident around foods that on which historically binged.  Once your eating pattern has become less chaotic and you are feeding yourself more regularly throughout the day with foods you enjoy, you will work with your dietitian on “challenge foods.”  Challenge foods are foods that you avoid (due to fear of binge or binge-purge), foods that you regularly binge on, and/or foods that cause a lot of anxiety before or after eating them.

A dietitian can work with you several ways to do this, such as doing an in-the-office food challenge (yep, eating your challenge food during the appointment) and practicing eating the foods with others.

5.  Intuitive eating.

One of the last steps of nutritional therapy for binge eating and bulimia nervosa is learning how to listen and respond to the internal cues your body provides.  In other words, you will learn how to trust your body, not some diet, when it comes to feeding yourself.

Note:  Consulting with a registered dietitian who has experience treating eating disorders is a must.  While a registered dietitian is one member of the treatment team, a medical doctor, counselor, and a psychiatrist are also needed.

reduce binge eating infographic
reduce binge eating
reduce binge eating

 

Forget About Diets To Improve Your Health This Year

Forget About Diets To Improve Your Health This Year

It is that time of year: Everyone’s talking about their New Year’s Resolutions. Many headlines promote the “newest” diet trends to “jumpstart” weight loss in 2018. A 2014 study found that “stay fit and healthy” and “lose weight” were the top contenders as New Year’s Resolutions, at 32% and 37%, respectively.

 

In my blog post, 5 Reasons Not to Diet in 2017,  I encourage readers to stop dieting in order to feel in more control of their eating and health.  

 

So, maybe you are concerned about your health. Maybe you have diabetes or a family history of heart disease, or maybe you are noticing that it is harder to move in your body at its current fitness level.  

 

Maybe you are so tired of dieting that you just can’t diet anymore (the diet is the problem, not you), or maybe you are recovered from an eating disorder and you know that dieting is a risk factor for relapsing.

 

Choosing not to diet for weight loss doesn’t mean ignoring your health.

 

Dieting sets-up this all or nothing thinking. You follow the diet, watching meticulously what you are eating to lose weight.  Dieting usually is paired with an exercise routine. On the other hand, if you aren’t dieting, you may have developed a “screw it” attitude. You don’t pay attention to how you eat and you don’t exercise until you are on your next diet. (By the way, this is no personal failing of your own- studies show that dieting doesn’t work long-term).

 

The third option is not often presented by the medical community or diet programs. This option is to eat nutritious foods, move your body in a way that feels good to you, get enough sleep, get medical screenings or check-ups as recommended, and so on in the spirit of health, not weight loss.

 

You may be thinking, “But don’t I need to lose weight to be healthy?”

 

No!

 

This answer never wins me any popularity contests. There is not great scientific evidence to show that having a larger body causes medical problems.  I would argue that the disconnection from our bodies that dieting causes is what leads to health problems. Additionally, modern medical science has NOT come up with a non-surgical intervention or treatment for weight loss that works long-term (meaning the ability to keep the lost weight off).

 

There is good evidence that dieting can be a predictor of weight gain and problematic eating behaviors such as purging, binge eating, or other types of eating disorders.  Additionally, it is natural for folks to stop exercising if it isn’t producing weight loss, despite the cardiovascular, muscular and mental health benefits of exercise.

 

There is evidence that health-promoting behaviors (weight is not a behavior) do improve our health.

 

Health as a Value

 

If you are reading this, I am guessing that one of your values is health.  What is a value?  A value is what you judge to be important in life.  Examples of values include family, being financially independent, or acting in an ethical manner. Values can help us guide our behaviors.  Honesty is a value that most of us share, so we do our best to not lie, steal, or cheat.  

 

Oftentimes goals are confused with values.   A goal is something achievable such as running a marathon or having a fancy car.  With values, there is no completion date, and they can’t be crossed off our to-do-list.

 

When you put on your seatbelt or wear sunscreen you are practicing a behavior that is guided by your value of health. Every time you put on your seatbelt you are reducing your risk of serious harm when you drive. Going to the doctor for physicals and screenings or going to the dentist is another behavior that supports the value of health.

 

You may be asking yourself, “Isn’t body weight a value?” Unlike wearing your seatbelt, weight is not a behavior or a value. It is a biomedical marker. Lowering your cholesterol is not a behavior. You do things like take medication, eat a heart-healthy food or exercise to try to reduce your cholesterol levels. Eating nutritious food and moving your body in a way that feels good to you are behaviors that support a value of health.

 

What to do:

 

  1. Get clear on your values around health.  

 

Why do you value health?  Maybe you love to travel and having good health allows you to do this.  Maybe you want to have a long-life in order to see your children or grandchildren grow-up.  The media or diet programs encourage you to “take charge of your health”, but these are vague statements that are only helpful in the short-term, not the long-term.

 

  1. Set realistic measurable goals that support your values.

 

Getting physical movement in for a certain amount of time each week is an example of a concrete and measurable goal.  Other goals include getting a mammogram once a year or getting a certain amount of sleep every night.

 

  1. Set meaningful goals that align with your values.

 

Imagine that one of your values is traveling and you have a vacation coming up that requires a lot of walking.  If you achieve a certain level of physical fitness you will be able to enjoy your vacation more. Focusing on the reasoning behind your value of health will help make the exercise more meaningful even though it may be uncomfortable or inconvenient at the time.  (Instead of, “I should go exercise because it is good for me.”)

 

  1. If you notice that you aren’t achieving your goals, consider if the goals you are setting are really meaningful to you.

 

Do you actually want to do these things, or do you just think you should want to? Set goals that are achievable (sometimes we set goals that are too big and we get overwhelmed). Consider psychotherapy if you think you may have an eating disorder, depression, anxiety, or other mental illness.

 

Finally, check out these other resources to learn how to ditch dieting & make peace with food: Intuitive Eating and Health at Every Size.

Forget About Diets To Improve Your Health This Year infographic
Forget About Diets To Improve Your Health This Year