Parents: An Essential Part Of Eating Disorder Treatment

Posted on June 29, 2022June 28, 2022 by Alison Pelz, LD, RD, CDE, LCSW

To all the parents out there: you are an important part of your child’s eating disorder treatment team! This is true even if your child is no longer a child, but a young adult or an adult. Even if you don’t live with your child, you have an important role to play in eating disorder recovery.

Why are parents + caregivers so important in eating disorder recovery?

Therapists, doctors, and dietitians are must-haves on any eating disorder treatment team. But parents have an important role to play too! Here are a few reasons why parents are important in the recovery process:

You spend much more time with your child than the treatment team does. As a therapist, I may spend one to two hours a week with your kiddo, you spend dozens of hours!
You are usually involved in feeding or making sure that your teen is fed.
You have a relationship with them. They trust and love you. If you are a parent of a teen, I know it may not always feel like it, but it is true!
You know your child better than anyone else!

Where do eating disorders come from?

Eating disorders are thought to function as a way to cope with uncomfortable feelings. Feeling distressing emotions is, well, distressing. Eating disorders often develop as a coping mechanism to avoid feeling those painful feelings. It’s possible to learn new ways to cope to manage those distressing feelings.

As a parent, you can learn tools to help your child manage their feelings without using the eating disorder to cope.

When you hear this you may feel like a deer caught in the headlights.

You may be thinking, “Yeah right! I can’t even get through a conversation with my teen without it turning into a fight.”
Or maybe you’re thinking, “I can’t get them to say more than a few words to me.”
You may even be throwing your arms up in exasperation because your kiddo is in total denial of their eating disorder.

If your child has an eating disorder, you may be feeling a range of emotions all of which are okay. You might feel anger, worry, sadness, resentment, disbelief, panic, and hopelessness, to name a few. And you may be feeling no way equipped to help your child recover from an eating disorder, but you are wrong.

Historically, parents weren’t always involved, and at times even discouraged to participate, in the treatment of eating disorders. In recent years, we are learning that parents can be a really powerful tool in their kid’s recovery process. This holds true not just for eating disorders, but for all mental health conditions. Parents have an important role to play!

Parents often blame themselves or feel responsible for their child’s eating disorder.

I haven’t met a parent or loved one who doesn’t want what is best for their loved one – to be happy and live a productive, healthy life.

Let me be clear: you are not to blame for your child’s eating disorder.

Eating disorders are complex. They develop for a variety of different reasons including social, biological, and psychological factors. For example, did you know that being a girl or a history of dieting are risk factors for developing an eating disorder?

As an eating disorder therapist + dietitian, I encourage parents to focus less on why their child has an eating disorder, and more on eliminating the eating disorder.

For example, if your child developed cancer you would spend less thought on why she got it, but more on getting her good treatment.

While you are not to blame for your child’s eating disorder, you certainly can be part of the treatment and solution. Often, parents don’t feel equipped to help their children recover. Parenting is hard, and parenting a teen with an eating disorder has a unique set of challenges.

You are right you may not have the eating disorder knowledge (yet!) to help. But, you do have a special connection and bond with your child that is so powerful in the treatment of eating disorders.

Some parents report that their kids don’t want help for their eating disorder, or even that they are in denial about their eating disorder. Certainly, this feels like it is true, but it is not.

Remember eating disorders are a way for your child to cope with discomfort. Yep that’s right – just like their lovey or security blanket that they had as a kiddo! The disorder is serving a purpose, even if it’s not a healthy way to cope. Since the disorder is filling a need, it might seem like on the surface, your child doesn’t want to acknowledge or deal with it. However, living with an eating disorder can be a miserable existence. Your child deserves better!

Now that I have (hopefully) convinced you that you are an important part of your teens recovery, you may be asking yourself how do I help my teen?

Here are a few tips to get you started.

Get educated about eating disorders. Here are specific resources for parents.
Make sure that your teen has a complete treatment team.
Verbalize to your teen that while you don’t have all the answers, eating disorders are serious mental health conditions, treatment is needed, and that you are going to be there every step of the way to support them.

Are you looking for more ways to support your child as they navigate eating disorder recovery? Please feel free to book a free 15 minute phone call with me to learn how to better support your teen as they navigate an eating disorder.

5 Ways Journaling Can Help in Eating Disorder Recovery

Posted on February 16, 2022February 15, 2022 by Alison Pelz, LD, RD, CDE, LCSW

What do Oprah Winfrey, Freda Kahlo, Marie Curie, and Anne Frank all have in common? (Besides being exceptional women, that is.)

They all journaled.

When you read about why these incredible women kept a diary, building a strong connection with one’s emotions and thoughts is the theme that comes up.

People who suffer from eating disorders often really struggle to identify and cope with their emotions and thoughts. (And not just people with eating disorders, lots of people struggle to connect with what they’re feeling and why!) Often the eating disorder then becomes the way to cope with those emotions, unhealthy as it may be.

Having a strong journaling practice doesn’t mean that your eating disorder will just evaporate on its own. But keeping a journal is a tool that can help you in your journey in recovery, and support your work in therapy. If you don’t have a therapist or treatment team click here to learn more.

Journaling can help:

Rid unhelpful, repetitive thoughts swarming around in your head.

Simply writing thoughts down sometimes can provide a reduction of these thoughts. The more we hold onto or try to bury our feelings, the stronger they usually become–and the more it feels like they can start to control us. When you take time to get the thoughts out in some way, your mind is able to release them, instead of clinging onto them.

Identify your fears and worries.

Many people who have eating disorders often experience high levels of anxiety. Journaling can assist in identifying those fears and worries in order to evaluate if they are actually reflective of the truth. Learning to identify when our fear those fears are “real” can help both your problem solving skills and your ability to tolerate some levels of anxiety.

Increase a sense of control by reflecting and processing thoughts and feelings.

Giving yourself a space to review and reflect on what you’re feeling without judgement can help take the power out of those strong feelings. Instead of feeling like they are controlling you, learning to reflect & process them helps to teach you that your feelings are trying to communicate something to you, but they don’t have to dictate your life.

Explore and sort out your emotions.

Identifying, understanding and communicating emotions can be hard, especially for those with eating disorders. Often people with eating disorders use eating disorder behaviors to cope with their emotions. Journaling is a tool that can instead help you to navigate your emotions, so you don’t have to rely on your eating disorder to manage them.

Reduce avoidance of problems & stress.

While avoiding problems and stress may seem helpful particularly in the short-term, in the long-term it actually increases feelings of stress, discomfort, and fear. For example, if you are anticipating a tough conversation with someone the longer you put the conversation off the more stressful it becomes. Usually, once the conversation is completed there is a sense of relief. Merely writing about the anticipated conversation is a great first step to reducing avoidance. Eating disorder behaviors often serve as a way to avoid stress and discomfort, so developing a healthy practice to manage stress can help reduce reliance on those behaviors, as well as strengthen your stress management skills in the long term.

Tips to Get Your Journaling Practice Started

Journaling can be downright daunting–especially if you are not used to talking about emotions. But think of journaling as a practice, something that you may feel “not good at” at the beginning, but over time you will become more confident.

Make it part of your daily routine like brushing your teeth. Perhaps journal at around the same time or point in your day. Maybe start off with journaling five minutes a day and increase the length of time as needed or as your confidence builds around journaling.

What to Journal About:

There is no “right way or wrong way” to journal. The point of the journal is to get your thoughts and feelings out on paper. No need for perfect grammar, spelling, or handwriting.

You may start by writing about your day (what you did, thought, and any feelings that came up), or a particular situation that you felt strongly about–whether it was a good or bad feeling.

It may be handy to keep a list of feeling such as this one next to your journal. This can be a good tool to increase your emotional vocabulary, strengthen your ability to identify what you’re feeling, and really understand your emotions.

If you don’t know where to get started with your journaling practice, try one of these journal prompts:

3-5 things you are most grateful and why.
One thing you felt proud about today.
Something you recently did that was hard and how you manage it.
A stressful situation and how you can cope with it.
A letter to a future self.
What do you feel most worried about and why.
What others would say to you about why they care for you.
Eating disorder-specific:
Name 5 ways your eating disorder is helpful and 5 ways that your eating disorder is unhelpful.
If I didn’t have my eating disorder then I would be doing these five things.
If I didn’t have my eating disorder then I would feel these 5 things.
I would want my friends and/or family to know about my eating disorder ar these things.

If you are looking for more ways to support yourself in your journey of eating disorder recovery, talking to a therapist may help. Please call for a free 15-minute phone consultation to learn how I work with clients with eating disorders and loved ones.

Exploring Values Instead of New Year’s Resolutions in 2022

Posted on January 13, 2022September 16, 2024 by Alison Pelz, LD, RD, CDE, LCSW

How do you feel about New Year’s Resolutions? The new year often feels like the perfect time to implement changes, and the constant flood of “New Year New You” marketing definitely adds to the pressure to shake things up each January. Unfortunately, a lot of that marketing is heavily influenced by diet culture. Instead of making a New Year’s Resolution in 2022, try exploring your values instead.

Diet culture, or a cultural belief that values thinness over physical and emotional health, absolutely reinforces resolutions that are focused on weight, food, or exercise.

New Year’s Resolutions focused on food, weight and exercise can wreak havoc, even when they’re well intentioned. 1 in 4 dieters will go on to develop an eating disorder, so a new year’s resolution to lose weight can spiral out of control no matter what intentions are behind it. Remember, dieters themselves are never the problem – the problem is that diets don’t work.

Values are something many therapists explore with clients. Values are the cornerstone of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, or ACT. ACT “teaches mindfulness skills to help individuals live and behave in ways consistent with personal values while developing psychological flexibility.” Values are fundamental beliefs that guide our attitudes and our actions.

You might be wondering how values and goals differ.

Values are different from goals because goals are something that you achieve and can check off.

Values, unlike goals, don’t have an end. They’re a part of your basic belief system about the world and your role in it. Values may shift over time, but they are often long-term.

For example, a goal could be “I want to travel to all 50 states”. In contrast, the value in this case could be “travel”. Booking a trip lets you meet your goal and uphold your value. As they say in ACT, you are participating in a value-driven behavior by booking the trip.

I find using values work is helpful for clients with eating disorders for several reasons. Values work leads to:

Increased sense of self

Exploring your values helps you answer questions like “Who am I?” and “Where am I going?” Values work also helps folks suffering with eating disorders understand that they are so much more than their eating disorder, their weight, or how they feel about their body.

When you’re doing values work, it helps to come from a place of abundance versus a place of scarcity. So often, people don’t feel like they are enough or they’re doing enough. In contrast, coming from a place of abundance helps you to recognize that you are enough just as you are, and that you are doing your best.

It’s kind of like looking at the glass half-full instead of half-empty. Instead of assuming the worst about yourself, work on assuming the best.

Increased confidence by connecting actions with purpose.

Establishing what your values are is an important way to get to know yourself better. When you understand what your values are and why they’re important to you, it’s easier to recognize things that interfere with those values.

Values work can help those with eating disorders recognize that their eating disorder interferes with many of their values. This can often serve as a motivator for recovery.

Fewer feelings of worthlessness.

Feeling worthless or not good enough can be extremely distressing. Let’s say you have a thought “I didn’t do anything today.” When clients say this to me, I often have them tell me what they did that day. There’s always something!

For example, maybe they texted a friend, called their mom, went to work, paid a bill and went to the grocery store to pick up some items for dinner to cook for their family.

These everyday tasks or activities most likely reinforce their values:

Texting a friend is connected with the value of relationships and caring
Calling their mom connected with the value of family and caring
Went to work and paid a bill connected with a value of financial health and reliability
Going to the grocery store is connected with health and family.

Are you stumped on what values are important to you? Here are a few examples of values to consider:

Health
Financial wellbeing
Recreation
Personal growth
Family
Relationships
Spirituality
Community
Social justice
Honesty
Reliable
Caring
Fun
Kindness
Authenticity
Learning
Stability

For folks who struggle with eating disorders, it is helpful to think how recovery behaviors are linked with values.

So if you value health and have an eating disorder…it might feel uncomfortable to hold both of those at the same time. Acting in a way that is aligned with your values can be a powerful motivator for recovery.

For example, if you think you may have an eating disorder and you value health, merely reading this post is a value-driven behavior (a behavior that upholds your values). Or let’s say you are in treatment for your eating disorder. When you attend treatment appointments you are behaving in a value-driven way.

Rather than focusing on resolutions in 2022, exploring your values can be a more impactful way to make changes that are in alignment with what’s important to you.

Are you interested in exploring your own values and how your behaviors stem from them? Click here to learn more.

2021: A Year In Review

Posted on December 15, 2021December 14, 2021 by Crowncreatives

What a year! 2021 was our second year in a pandemic, and seemed just as chaotic and challenging as 2020 was. Take a moment to pat yourself on the back for making it to the end of this year, it certainly hasn’t been easy, but I’m so glad you’re here. This too shall pass, and until it does, I’ll be here to support you virtually to stop feeling out of control and gain a sense of calm in relationship with food and your body

This year, more than ever, people experienced anxiety and burnout. If you’re feeling like you’re running on empty, you’re not alone. I hope you get some quality time to rest and recuperate this season. It’s always important to rest, but with the constant chaos of existence right now you might be feeling the need to slow down more than ever. I encourage you to lean into it!

You’re allowed to have periods of rest, and it’s important to listen to your body when it’s trying to tell you something. Consider this your permission slip to do nothing but self-care for the rest of the year!

Every year, I like to round up all of my blog posts from the year in one place. It’s fun to look back on the year through these posts, and I hope you find them useful as you work toward peace with food.

Here’s what I wrote about this year:

5 Reasons not to Diet in 2021 (or Ever)

“Unless you are taking a break from social media and the news, you most likely have been bombarded with messages about dieting and weight related New Year’s resolutions. Diet programs are promising the magic bullet for good health and weight loss in the New Year.

Maybe this year you are re-thinking your New Year’s resolutions. Perhaps you are beginning to notice that dieting is taking up too much space in your life or you are tired of worrying about what you eat or what you look like. It could be you are looking to “get off the diet roller coaster” permanently and heal your relationship with food and your body.

If you are ready to give up dieting, you’re not alone. Consider these five reasons to quit dieting for good.”

Anorexia Nervosa: One Size Does NOT Fit All

“Unfortunately, there are many incorrect assumptions associated with eating disorders. One I see a lot is the assumption that in order to have an eating disorder, particularly anorexia nervosa, one has to have very low body weight. This is simply not true.

Sadly these assumptions block those suffering from eating disorders from getting the life-saving treatment they need. In fact, most people with eating disorders don’t necessarily fit neatly into an eating disorder category.

Eating disorders are more about how the person relates to food, exercise, and body than what a person looks like.”

The Body Image-Eating Disorder Connection

“How we perceive our bodies is influenced by many factors, including family, friends, media, gender identity, culture, and the health-care system, to name a few. Body image is not static. It may change depending on our mood, situation, stage of life, or the season.

The majority of those who suffer with eating disorders have a negative body image. One of the key features of eating disorders is the overvaluation of weight, shape, and eating habits on self-worth.

Self-worth is how and what we think about ourselves. In other words, those who struggle with eating disorders equate much of their self-worth with their ability to control their weight, shape, and eating habits. Having a negative body image often keeps the eating disorder going.”

Maintaining Eating Disorder Recovery as a College Freshman

“College can be a difficult transition for anyone, but if you’re in recovery for an eating disorder, it can be a particularly stressful transition!

Some of the challenges of maintaining your recovery while returning to school include change in routine, increased demands and independence, and exercise/diet culture.

Remember: it’s normal for eating disorder symptoms to recur in times of high stress and periods of transition. But by taking time to consider how your recovery will be impacted in this period of transition, you can create a plan to cope with stress and continue with your recovery.”

Why You Should Try Body Acceptance Over Body Positivity

“The idea of body positivity has its roots in fighting diet culture, but the term doesn’t resonate with everyone. After all, feeling positive about your body is a tall order for a lot of people.

First of all, there is a multi-billion dollar diet industry that uses its considerable resources and influence to convince us all that there is something wrong with our bodies. Feeling insecure about how our bodies look is a surefire way to get us to buy products that will “fix” us. However, consider the idea that there was nothing wrong with your body in the first place.

People who are chronically ill or disabled might not feel like they can be positive about a body that is constantly in pain or not able to move through the world easily. People who are recovering from eating disorders might not trust their body’s cues or might feel distress when thinking about their bodies.

Body acceptance might feel like a more attainable goal than body positivity.”

4 Tips for Anyone Who Loves an Adult in Eating Disorder Recovery

“It’s possible for eating disorders to initially develop later in life, not just during adolescence. It’s also possible that adults suffering from an eating disorder developed it during adolescence and never fully recovered. Life stressors (like a pandemic, for example!) later in life can also cause a relapse of eating disorders.

Eating disorders develop for a variety of reasons including genetics, temperament, gender, and dieting history to name a few.

It is less important why and how the eating disorder developed, and more important to focus on supporting your loved one in their eating disorder recovery.”

I’ll be back in 2022, writing more about ED recovery, food peace, and weight bias. If there are any topics you want me to cover next year, let me know. You can send me a message here, and you can also follow me on Facebook. Every week, I share resources from myself + other eating disorder experts, so follow if you’re looking for more information.

4 Tips for Anyone Who Loves an Adult in Eating Disorder Recovery

Posted on November 10, 2021November 9, 2021 by Alison Pelz, LD, RD, CDE, LCSW

When you hear the words “eating disorder” what comes to mind? More often than not, eating disorders are associated with teenage girls. While it is true eating disorders often develop in adolescence, adults can have eating disorders, too.

It’s possible for eating disorders to initially develop later in life, not just during adolescence. It’s also possible that adults suffering from an eating disorder developed it during adolescence and never fully recovered. Life stressors (like a pandemic, for example!) later in life can also cause a relapse of eating disorders.

Eating disorders develop for a variety of reasons including genetics, temperament, gender, and dieting history to name a few.

It is less important why and how the eating disorder developed, and more important to focus on supporting your loved one in their eating disorder recovery.

If you love someone in eating disorder recovery, here are four ways to show your support:

1. Think about an eating disorder like a physical illness.

An eating disorder, like cancer, is not a choice. This is often misunderstood. If it was as simple as just choosing to eat more food, far fewer people would suffer with eating disorders.

If your loved one was going through treatment for cancer you may do some of the following: learn about their diagnosis, take them to treatment appointments, provide support, and check-in with them more frequently.

You can do the same with eating disorders. Eating disorders are dangerous and can cause long-term health effects and even death, and they should be taken seriously. See what you can do to understand that eating disorders (EDs) are a physical as well as mental illness.

2. Get educated on eating disorders.

Learning as much as you can about eating disorders is another way to support a loved one in recovery. Eating disorders on the surface appear to be about food. But, make no mistake, while food issues are part of the eating disorder, eating disorders are psychiatric illnesses that must be treated by experienced clinicians. Here are some resources to learn more about eating disorders:

The National Association of Eating Disorders
The Eating Disorder Sourcebook by Carolyn Costin
Eight Keys to Recovery from an Eating Disorder by Carolyn Costin and Gwen Schubert Grabb
Skills-based Learning for Caring for a Loved One with an Eating Disorder by Janet Treasure, Grainne Smith and Anna Crane

You can also ask your loved one if they would like for you to attend treatment appointments with them so you can get a better understanding of their treatment plan and goals.

There are also resources on social media sites like Instagram that offer helpful information about eating disorders, diet culture, and recovery. Make sure to check that the information you’re getting is coming from a reliable source – there are lots of folks out there who borrow language from body positive and anti-diet circles but who are still pushing intentional weight loss or food restriction. It can be really eye-opening to learn about the root causes of eating disorders, in addition to being a great way to support someone you love with an eating disorder.

3. Learn how to communicate with your loved one in a supportive way.

As with most things, supporting someone in eating disorder recovery requires communication. The best way to find out how to support them is to ask! Ask them directly what would make them feel supported or what they’re struggling with. Find out what they would find helpful or for ways you can provide support (or adjust your support if necessary).

It can be tricky to communicate about such emotionally charged topics. Statements such as these can feel supportive to your loved one.

“I know this is hard.”
“You can do hard things.”
“I am here if you would like to talk about it.”

There are a lot of ways to be supportive, but some statements aren’t helpful for folks in ED recovery. Unhelpful statements that you may be tempted to say (remember the ED is not only about the food)

“Just eat.”
“I don’t know why this is so hard…do what I do [insert advice about food, exercise].”

Remember, eating disorders are not just about the food. Everyone’s body is different, and most of us aren’t qualified to give out medical or nutritional advice anyway – we can leave that to the folks on the treatment team.

Another thing to keep in mind is that mealtime can be particularly stressful for those with eating disorders. Some meals and foods may be easier or harder for your loved one to eat. If you eat with your loved one at mealtime it may be helpful to focus on light conversations that have nothing to do with their eating disorder.

4. Be patient.

Eating disorder recovery is a marathon, not a sprint. Recovery is not linear, in fact, it can get quite messy. It requires lots of learning and unlearning, as well as patience and self-compassion.

Don’t give up, and keep checking in with your loved one. Get support for yourself if you need a space where you can process the emotions of supporting someone through recovery. It’s okay to recognize that supporting someone sometimes means asking for help yourself. The National Alliance for Eating Disorders has free support groups for loved ones.

If you are looking for more ways to support your loved one in eating disorder recovery, talking to a therapist may help. Please call for a free 15-minute phone consultation to learn how I work with clients with eating disorders and loved ones.

Consider Body Acceptance Over Body Positivity

Posted on October 20, 2021September 16, 2024 by Alison Pelz, LD, RD, CDE, LCSW

There’s a lot of buzz in the wellness and mental health worlds about body positivity and body acceptance, but what do those terms even mean?

Body acceptance is the idea that it’s not always possible to feel positively about your body, but it is always possible to accept it and treat it with kindness. The end goal of both of these is to increase the acceptance of all body sizes and to help people feel more comfortable in their own bodies.

In contrast, body positivity is the idea that everyone deserves to feel positively about their body image. If you’ve ever seen a post on social media telling you to “love your body”, then you’ve probably experienced body positivity.

At first glance, body positivity sounds great. After all, things would be so much simpler if we could all just love our bodies! However, that’s often easier said than done for a number of people.

The idea of body positivity has its roots in fighting diet culture, but the term doesn’t resonate with everyone. After all, feeling positive about your body is a tall order for a lot of people.

People who are chronically ill or have varying abilities might not feel like they can be positive about a body that is constantly in pain or not able to move through the world easily. People who are recovering from eating disorders might not trust their body’s cues or might feel distress when thinking about their bodies.

Body acceptance might feel like a more attainable goal than body positivity.

You might also go back and forth between positivity and acceptance for your body depending on the day. Nothing lasts forever, and the feelings you currently have about your body probably won’t last. What will last are the consequences of the way you treat yourself, so do what you can to show yourself compassion.

It’s important to remember that one isn’t better than the other. Body positivity and body acceptance are options, and if one feels more attainable than the other, don’t push yourself to feel things about your body that you’re not ready for.

Here are some questions that I get asked frequently about body positivity and acceptance:

Question: I hear all of this stuff about body positivity and feel hopeless. I feel like I am nowhere near loving my body. Is it necessary for me to feel body positivity to recover from my eating disorder?

Answer: While body image, or what we feel and think about our body, is closely tied to eating disorders, body positivity is not necessary for recovery. Body positivity is an ideal outcome of recovery, but it’s not the only outcome available.

In a nutshell, body dissatisfaction or a negative body image often contributes to the extreme eating and exercise behaviors we see in folks with eating disorders. In fact, if negative body image is not in check, the eating disorder will keep going. However, feeling positive about your body is not required to start recovery.

Body acceptance is often a more accessible place to start. As mentioned above, body acceptance is the practice of acceptance, even if you aren’t completely satisfied with it. Body positivity is the practice of feeling positively about your body, which can be a lot harder to do.

It is okay to like some parts of ourselves, but not all. Like so much in life (jobs, school), we may like some parts but not all. Either way, we accept that the parts we don’t like are there.

Question: I really don’t like my body. How can I at least work on increasing body acceptance?

Answer: The knee jerk reaction in our culture is if we don’t like something we need to “fix it”. Certainly, diet culture gives a false notion that if we “work hard enough” then we can have the body we want.

I am here to say I have never met a person with an eating disorder that is NOT a hard worker.

Body acceptance is about changing our thoughts about our body, not about changing our body to match our thoughts.

A typical thought someone may have with body dissatisfaction is “If I get my body to look a certain way I will be more confident.”

While there may be some truth to that, changing your looks is not the only way to feel confident. Confidence can come from so many places, but unless you address the root of that insecurity, a new one will pop up in its place.

If you broaden your thoughts, you will see that there are lots of other ways to build or have confidence without staying in your eating disorder.

Another typical thought someone may have about body dissatisfaction is “I am afraid of what people are thinking of me.”

That is to say you fear people will react negatively to you. Lots of times, you don’t even have proof of this happening, but the fear is there all the same.

Unfortunately, many folks who struggle with eating disorders have been teased, ridiculed, or bullied about their body. Many people who struggle with eating disorders come from families that place high value on looks. (If that’s the case for you, this is something to address and unpack with a therapist.)

More often than not, when we assume people are thinking something bad about our bodies, we don’t have any evidence to back this up.

These thoughts and worries are the real distress, not our bodies. Freeing yourself from the worry that other people are judging your body can give you more time to think about what it would feel like to accept your body as it is.

If accepting your body still sounds scary, there are things you can do to help. One way to increase body acceptance is to identify parts of your body that you do like. It is OK to like some parts of your body but not all parts. You can keep a journal where you write down what you like about your body. You can write down something that you’re grateful for that your body does – like how your stomach holds in all your organs and protects them, or how your thighs help you get from place to place. You don’t have to love each little bit of your body to want to take care of it and keep it safe. Acceptance is enough.

Increasing body acceptance is key in eating disorder recovery. If you’re looking for more support in developing body acceptance, please click here to schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation with me.